My daughter is a daughter, not a son

Yes, my daughter is a daughter, and she is not equal to a son. She is a girl, and she is not equal to a boy. And she surely is a normal human being, and not Lakshmi or any goddess.

You ask why not?, I ask why? Why should I consider her as my son when the God has blessed her with the organs of a female, and the term for a female child is ‘daughter’, not ‘son’. This is simple language basics which I am sure everyone knows, then where does this confusion come from? And I am sure that this confusion exists only in a country where the birth of a girl child is not celebrated and everyone prays to have a male child. Only in such a country people need such pseudo-consolations.

Have anyone of you, in your entire life, ever heard anyone saying such things on the birth of a male child? Have anyone of you ever heard people consoling the mother of a male child saying ‘don’t worry, don’t feel sad, boys too are good, they are no less than girls these days, raise your son the way you would have raised your daughter, and blah blah blah…’. Have anyone of you ever heard saying on the birth of a boy ‘don’t feel sad, see…you have got someone to ask you a glass of water or a cup of tea, you will now have someone to share your household pressures with…’. Yes, these exactly are the words I have been getting to hear since the birth of my lifeline, my daughter.

Daughter, or a son, the only difference between the two is of the gender. But what common in both is that both are our child. No one is superior, and no one is inferior either. Then where does the need of this consoling come from? Why the parents of a female child can just not be congratulated, the way parents of a male child are congratulated, just congratulated, not consoled.

And I probably will never understand the ‘Lakshmi’ thing that people always talk about. I really don’t want to raise a goddess as my child. I am happy that my child is an ordinary human being. Why do people need to compare daughters to goddess or Lakshmi to feel happy? Is the birth of (girl) child is not good enough a reason to be happy and to celebrate?

The moments of biggest irony are when educated youth utter such words, who refuse to use their wisdom and understanding, or whose education failed to build wisdom and understanding in them, the youth who only crammed what their ‘dadis’ and ‘nanis’ say.

And for the parents who very proudly boasts that their daughters are their sons, and they don’t feel bad about having a daughter, or they do not discriminate between daughters and sons, or they are raising their daughters as their sons, etc.; please parents, do not insult you daughters, please do not insult the little munchkins that you have produced form your own blood.

The people who contemplate themselves as modern and broad minded on account of considering (or pretend to consider) girls equal to boys are actually those people who are feeding these outdated concepts and keeping them alive even in 21st century. These are the people who actually (indirectly) say that daughters are inferior, and so one needs to ‘consider’ them equal to boys. Why they never tell us to consider boys to be equal to girls. Why this whole ‘considering’ is even required. Which world are you living in dear folks? World has come much ahead, or at least trying to come ahead of this girl boy thing. Please rise above it. Please don’t pull the society back. Or, if you cannot understand the depth of what I am trying to say here, my only request is… Please keep your sympathy, wisdom and broad mindedness to yourself, and please stop telling mothers like me what daughters are. We really are not interested in listening to the ‘benefits’ of having a daughter, because we don’t need to. Please stop telling us that ‘daughters’ too….mmmm….not that bad. Please don’t tell us that. We are really very happy to be mothers of healthy children. Gender is irrelevant.

So… yes, my daughter is a daughter, and she is not equal to a son. Because she does not need to be..… just the way a son is a son, and not equal to a daughter.

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Also Read what society has to say to mothers like me who give birth to girl child

And Letter of a working mother to her daughter.

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